{"id":161940,"date":"2022-02-19T07:59:11","date_gmt":"2022-02-19T13:59:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/shuffly.net\/zoop\/?p=161940"},"modified":"2022-04-20T11:24:27","modified_gmt":"2022-04-20T16:24:27","slug":"the-boogie-woogie-bugle-boy-of-gundam-wing-z","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/shuffly.net\/zoop\/the-boogie-woogie-bugle-boy-of-gundam-wing-z\/","title":{"rendered":"The Boogie-Woogie Bugle Boy of Gundam Wing Z"},"content":{"rendered":"

Via David Breitenbeck<\/a>, here’s a list, “Things Mr. Welch Is No Longer Allowed to Do in an RPG<\/a>.” A few items from the list:<\/p>\n

20. Polka is not appropriate marching music.<\/p>\n

94. I cannot base my ancient kung fu master on either Gene Simmons or Bluto Blutarski.<\/p>\n

105. I am not allowed to polymorph anyone into Abe Vigoda.<\/p>\n

134. The King’s Guards’ official name is not “The Royal Order of the Red Shirt”<\/p>\n

174. There is no use of Shatner’s spoken word album that doesn’t require a humanity check.<\/p>\n

199. My third wish cannot be ‘I wish you wouldn’t grant this wish.’<\/p>\n

221. If I get that Yugo up to 120mph again, that’s gonna get some paradox.<\/p>\n

251. I am not the Boogie-Woogie Bugle Boy of Gundam Wing Z.<\/p>\n

289. My character does not have the flaw Addiction: Helium.<\/p>\n

330. The Halfling Paladin does not represent the Lollipop Guild.<\/p>\n

411. It is bad form to shoot a god while he’s monologuing.<\/p>\n

476. The alignment of 2 years olds is not automatically Neutral Evil.<\/p>\n

559. Even if the Ranger offers his sword, the elf his bow and the dwarf his axe, my gnome can’t offer his accordion.<\/p>\n

623. Even if the rules allow it, I cannot play a Dire Gummi Bear.<\/p>\n

651. My alignment is not Sarcastic Good.<\/p>\n

753. No encouraging Swedish accents.<\/p>\n

781. My tribe’s trial by combat ritual is not best described as “Calvinball with axes.”<\/p>\n

845. It’s not a good idea to taunt Greek heroes with “Who’s your daddy?”<\/p>\n

968. A paladin with a British accent is acceptable. One with a Peter Lorre accent isn’t.<\/p>\n

975. There is something wrong with a 2nd level Kamikaze.<\/p>\n

1172. My brooding costumed vigilante can\u2019t take the flaw Dark Secret: Well Adjusted to Society.<\/p>\n

1337. Can\u2019t lure the Bastet into an ambush by turning on the can opener.<\/em><\/p>\n

See also DM of the Rings<\/a><\/em> and Chainmail Bikini<\/a><\/em>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Via David Breitenbeck, here’s a list, “Things Mr. Welch Is No Longer Allowed to Do in an RPG.” A few items from the list: 20. Polka is not appropriate marching music. 94. I cannot base my ancient kung fu master on either Gene Simmons or Bluto Blutarski. 105. I am not allowed to polymorph anyone … Continue reading “The Boogie-Woogie Bugle Boy of Gundam Wing Z”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[13,14],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-161940","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor-and-horror","category-lists"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p4xam3-G7W","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/shuffly.net\/zoop\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/161940","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/shuffly.net\/zoop\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/shuffly.net\/zoop\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/shuffly.net\/zoop\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/shuffly.net\/zoop\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=161940"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"http:\/\/shuffly.net\/zoop\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/161940\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":163537,"href":"http:\/\/shuffly.net\/zoop\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/161940\/revisions\/163537"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/shuffly.net\/zoop\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=161940"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/shuffly.net\/zoop\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=161940"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/shuffly.net\/zoop\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=161940"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}