Trivia that matter
I’m down to two shows, which is still twice as many as I was following at this time last year. The best remains Miss Kuroitsu from the Monster Development Department. However, despite its squicky premise, Life with an Ordinary Guy… hasn’t made me throw up yet. It helps to know your isekai clichés.
methylethyl, in the comments at Joseph Moore’s place:
Whenever I see study titles, or headlines, that involve “models”– I mentally add “In Legend of Zelda” or something equivalent to every conclusion. It helps put it in perspective. So, you know “model estimates covid spread by vaccination rate in Legend of Zelda” or “Climate model predicts 3-foot sea level rise by 2050 in Kingdom of Hyrule” or “Model predicts 10% rise in heart attack deaths with 5% increase in calorie consumption in The SIMS” Because any time you’re working with a model, you’re in video-game land, not the real world: video-game land is simplified, has far fewer variables, by definition cannot have unexpected events or outcomes, etc.
Via David Breitenbeck, here’s a list, “Things Mr. Welch Is No Longer Allowed to Do in an RPG.” A few items from the list:
20. Polka is not appropriate marching music.
94. I cannot base my ancient kung fu master on either Gene Simmons or Bluto Blutarski.
105. I am not allowed to polymorph anyone into Abe Vigoda.
134. The King’s Guards’ official name is not “The Royal Order of the Red Shirt”
174. There is no use of Shatner’s spoken word album that doesn’t require a humanity check.
199. My third wish cannot be ‘I wish you wouldn’t grant this wish.’
221. If I get that Yugo up to 120mph again, that’s gonna get some paradox.
251. I am not the Boogie-Woogie Bugle Boy of Gundam Wing Z.
289. My character does not have the flaw Addiction: Helium.
330. The Halfling Paladin does not represent the Lollipop Guild.
411. It is bad form to shoot a god while he’s monologuing.
476. The alignment of 2 years olds is not automatically Neutral Evil.
559. Even if the Ranger offers his sword, the elf his bow and the dwarf his axe, my gnome can’t offer his accordion.
623. Even if the rules allow it, I cannot play a Dire Gummi Bear.
651. My alignment is not Sarcastic Good.
753. No encouraging Swedish accents.
781. My tribe’s trial by combat ritual is not best described as “Calvinball with axes.”
845. It’s not a good idea to taunt Greek heroes with “Who’s your daddy?”
968. A paladin with a British accent is acceptable. One with a Peter Lorre accent isn’t.
975. There is something wrong with a 2nd level Kamikaze.
1172. My brooding costumed vigilante can’t take the flaw Dark Secret: Well Adjusted to Society.
1337. Can’t lure the Bastet into an ambush by turning on the can opener.
See also DM of the Rings and Chainmail Bikini.
Yesterday’s snow is mostly gone already, but there’s more winter scheduled next week. I’m tired of the cold. It’s time for more silliness.
The circle has been squared, sorta. (Via Pixy.)
When reading a book for the first time, skip the introduction.
I had planned to post a selection of epigrams for this year’s post-a-favorite-poem entry today, but Maureen Mullarkey’s commentary yesterday on Chicago finger food as served by Cardinal Cupich calls for more Lewis Carroll. So, here’s “The Walrus and the Carpenter.”
The sun was shining on the sea,
Shining with all his might:
He did his very best to make
The billows smooth and bright —
And this was odd, because it was
The middle of the night.
The moon was shining sulkily,
Because she thought the sun
Had got no business to be there
After the day was done —
‘It’s very rude of him,’ she said,
‘To come and spoil the fun.’
The sea was wet as wet could be,
The sands were dry as dry.
You could not see a cloud, because
No cloud was in the sky:
No birds were flying overhead —
There were no birds to fly.
I gather that youngsters have not heard of Neil Young. He was a musician popular about fifty years ago, noted for having the thinnest tenor of any professional singer. He ranks third on the list of the most whiny vocalists in rock, surpassed only by Kurt Cobain and Thom “Creep” Yorke. He wrote one listenable song, but Petrus Ratajczyk did it better.
When was the last time you saw a “question authority” bumper sticker (t-shirt, poster, etc.)?
I recently received the White Flower Farm Spring 2022 Garden Book. As gardening catalogs go, it’s relatively dignified, with a University Roman flag, text that emphasizes accuracy over hyperbole, and no exclamation points. WFF prices are at the high end of the range, but in the past the plants they shipped were of consistently good quality. I might order a few items from them.
Nevertheless, the catalog was disappointing. Years ago the “garden book” was valued as much for the text as for the selections. Written by one Amos Pettingill, it had a degree of personality missing from other catalogs. Although the bulk of the text was devoted to describing the merchandise, he often digressed, as in his discussion of Exbury azaleas.
Lord Lionel Rothschild, a member of the famous banking clan and extremely rich in the days before the Great Depression and World War II, was not only a great banker but a great gardener. He was no dilletante; Lord Rothschild not only worked over every detail in the development of his lovely estate in Exbury, but he also worked diligently on breeding Rhododendron — and Azalea, a very close branch of the Rhododendron family. He spared no money in this huge breeding program, for he had started it late in life and knew it could be successful quickly only through massive expenditures. He once employed 225 men, 75 of them professional gardeners, to care for this estate of 250 acres. By working with tens of thousands of crosses, instead of thousands, Lord Rothschild used his wealth to telescope time…. Money, people are inclined to forget, is a very useful thing — whether we go to the moon or piggy-back a fine strain of plants with it.
If you ever wondered what you would have done in 1930s Germany, you’re doing it right now.
Things are a bit noisy in Tonga. (There should be a round-up of information about the Hunga Tonga Hunga Ha’apai eruption soon at Volcano Café. Update: here you go.)
From the comments at Isegoria:
Years ago, I drove a visitor from the Middle East around the suburbs and countryside of my beautiful Rust Belt city. He observed, that in his country, one felt safe in the cities, but you feared going into the exurbs, as you would be at the mercy of bandits and other lawless types. He admired the fact that we had managed to reverse that order, which has held for most of human history.
The voice-over in one episode preview in Galaxy Angel AA from twenty years ago has nothing to do with the episode it is presumably describing, yet it seems strangely prescient.
The weather today is going to be topsy-turvy.
