Category: Humor and horror

Dorothy had reasons to be nervous …

This year’s Bulwer-Lytton winners have been posted. There are a few that aren’t too bad:

As she watched the small form swing backwards and forth from the crystal chandelier – hands on hips, sniffing the air and squeaking inaudibly – it suddenly became clear to Madame de Pompomme that she had done the wrong thing asking Jacques to find and bring back her long-lost sister: for, whilst her coterie would doubtless be enchanted for a short while, the novelty of Janine having been raised by bats since the age of two in caves of the North-west Congo would soon wear off in seventeenth-century France.

There are certain people in the world who emanate an aura of well being — they radiate sunshine, light up a room, bring out the best in others, and fill your half empty glass to overflowing – yes it was these very people thought Karl, as he sharpened his mirror-finished guthook knife, who were top of his list.

But most are laboriously dull, spliced together with too many semicolons and dashes.

The Lyttle Lytton results for 2008 were also disappointing, with nothing the caliber of “In 3010, the potatoes triumphed.”

If you want a laugh, I recommend watching the Stafford County, Virginia, Board of Supervisors in action. ((Please note that what is illustrated in the video is not “fuzzy math,” but stupidity.)) (Via the Maximum Leader.)

Miscellaneous links

Via a friend: Sex and Flirting in Japan. (There are no pictures, so it’s almost safe for work.)

Lost in the anime zone with John Ringo.

They’re not anime, and I recall posting them on my earlier weblogs, but they’re worth revisiting: Scientific Truth in Warning Labels, and Cognitive Hazards and other modern warning signs. (Via TexasBestGrok.)

“Definitely time to write some AP/RIAA slashfic.” (Via René’s Apple.)

Bonus link: Gainaxing as a source of energy.

Special bonus link: The Costume Hall of Shame. (Via .clue.)

Miscellany

How Obama can win:

Hey, McCain has been ignoring the catgirl vote throughout the primaries, I say Obama should take advantage of this. As a matter of fact, a strong anti-tentacle monster platform would bring in both the catgirls and the Lolis. He could then show show his strength on defense by committing to a crash course of giant robot development. All he would need at that point would be a promise of combat training for all nubile young schoolgirls and he would have the entire geek vote locked up.

On a related note, here’s the most frightening title I’ve heard in a while: The Melancholy of Hillary Rodham.

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That other dealer has Geneon merchandise on sale. Haibane Renmei, Someday’s Dreamers and others are going for $5 per disc, and this time there’s no minimum order.

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Via Pixy, sophisticated technology in the service of sheer silliness:

And some Leeky Star:

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Stranger than anime: the operatic guide to dating.

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Yoshitoshi ABe will be in Minnesota in September. It’s a bit out of bicycle range for me, unfortunately.

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Update: No. No. No. No. No. No.

Miscellany

The inhabitants of the moon never see an earthrise or earthset. However, spacecraft orbiting the moon, e.g., the Kaguya, do. Here is the earth rising and setting, as recorded in HD. (Via Aziz.)

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Speed Racer is probably worth skipping (though I might listen to Racer X). If you’re looking for an exciting race story, I recommend instead the Kuricorder Quartet’s take on “Highway Star”:

Here’s the quartet again with some tunes you might recognize.

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Understatement of the week:

Something tells me the commenter hasn’t met all that many nuns.

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Give peas a chance:

(Via Blackadder.)

Bad pun alert

The habitués of Chess House (which was on 72nd Street, but no longer exists) were mostly elderly Jewish men. The air was dense with pipe and cigar smoke. Opponents did not talk to each other much, but it was the custom to engage in incessant thinking aloud, chattering to oneself, and verbigeration. Once, when I blundered by leaving a knight en prise (meaning undefended and liable to capture)—or in the chess slang “hanging”—my elderly opponent wondered aloud, “Why is this knight different from any other knight?” I thought he was just making a sarcastic comment about my play, until ten years later I finally got the joke while watching a TV show about Passover!