Category: Humor and horror

… no thumbs will be broken this month

Consider the Harding/Agnew ticket:

Remember when you vote that the Fringe Party, in matters of economics as in every other matter, stands in favor of good things and against bad things. No other political party can say that with a straight face.

(Via Erik and Mark.)

The advantage of dead guys in office: they might smell a bit, but they won’t screw things up any worse than they already are.

Update: Big steps require big feet: Bigfoot/Nessie ’08

(Via Dustbury.)

You got a light, Mac?

Apropos of absolutely nothing, here are lines from songs that have caught my fancy for some reason or another over the years:

“You probably think this song is about you.”

“His hair was perfect.”

“Grunt, howl, grunt, howl.”

“And.”

“… with a soulful, bounding leap ….”

“I’m dead but I don’t know it.”

“Pippikippippippi!” ((Not to be confused with “Pipiru piru piru pipiru pi.”))

“Someone get me a ladder.”

“Today, I am two separate gorillas.”

“Fridays I go painting in the Louvre.”

“What a pumpkin.”

“We can’t even think of a word that rhymes.”

“No, but I’ve got a dark brown overcoat.”

Update: How could I forget:

And so, I broke into the Palace
With a sponge and a rusty spanner.
She said: “Eh, I know you, and you cannot sing.”
I said: “That’s nothing — you should hear me play piano.”

Not to mention, “I didn’t realize you wrote such bloody awful poetry.”

Arrrrgh, etc.

I heard yesterday that one of the great progressive rock bands, Gryphon, has reunited to record a new album and perhaps give some concerts after disbanding more than thirty years ago. I just did a little searching to verify that. While the main Gryphon fansite does announce their reunion, their MySpace page states that it’s been suspended. Grrr.

Here’s an example of the sort of music I’d been hoping to hear more of, their “Glastonbury Carol”:

[mp3]http://tancos.net/audio/GlastonburyCarol.mp3[/mp3]

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If you have things to do and have absolutely no time to spare, don’t click here. (My best so far is 466 528 576 pounds of fish, plus logs, boots and cell phones.) (Via Dale.)

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Kids, be your favorite martyr for Halloween. (Via large furry animals.)

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Warmth. (Via a small furry animal.)

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To put the Democratic convention in perspective, read Dave Barry. His coverage begins here.

Dorothy had reasons to be nervous …

This year’s Bulwer-Lytton winners have been posted. There are a few that aren’t too bad:

As she watched the small form swing backwards and forth from the crystal chandelier – hands on hips, sniffing the air and squeaking inaudibly – it suddenly became clear to Madame de Pompomme that she had done the wrong thing asking Jacques to find and bring back her long-lost sister: for, whilst her coterie would doubtless be enchanted for a short while, the novelty of Janine having been raised by bats since the age of two in caves of the North-west Congo would soon wear off in seventeenth-century France.

There are certain people in the world who emanate an aura of well being — they radiate sunshine, light up a room, bring out the best in others, and fill your half empty glass to overflowing – yes it was these very people thought Karl, as he sharpened his mirror-finished guthook knife, who were top of his list.

But most are laboriously dull, spliced together with too many semicolons and dashes.

The Lyttle Lytton results for 2008 were also disappointing, with nothing the caliber of “In 3010, the potatoes triumphed.”

If you want a laugh, I recommend watching the Stafford County, Virginia, Board of Supervisors in action. ((Please note that what is illustrated in the video is not “fuzzy math,” but stupidity.)) (Via the Maximum Leader.)

Miscellaneous links

Via a friend: Sex and Flirting in Japan. (There are no pictures, so it’s almost safe for work.)

Lost in the anime zone with John Ringo.

They’re not anime, and I recall posting them on my earlier weblogs, but they’re worth revisiting: Scientific Truth in Warning Labels, and Cognitive Hazards and other modern warning signs. (Via TexasBestGrok.)

“Definitely time to write some AP/RIAA slashfic.” (Via René’s Apple.)

Bonus link: Gainaxing as a source of energy.

Special bonus link: The Costume Hall of Shame. (Via .clue.)

Miscellany

How Obama can win:

Hey, McCain has been ignoring the catgirl vote throughout the primaries, I say Obama should take advantage of this. As a matter of fact, a strong anti-tentacle monster platform would bring in both the catgirls and the Lolis. He could then show show his strength on defense by committing to a crash course of giant robot development. All he would need at that point would be a promise of combat training for all nubile young schoolgirls and he would have the entire geek vote locked up.

On a related note, here’s the most frightening title I’ve heard in a while: The Melancholy of Hillary Rodham.

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That other dealer has Geneon merchandise on sale. Haibane Renmei, Someday’s Dreamers and others are going for $5 per disc, and this time there’s no minimum order.

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Via Pixy, sophisticated technology in the service of sheer silliness:

And some Leeky Star:

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Stranger than anime: the operatic guide to dating.

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Yoshitoshi ABe will be in Minnesota in September. It’s a bit out of bicycle range for me, unfortunately.

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Update: No. No. No. No. No. No.

Miscellany

The inhabitants of the moon never see an earthrise or earthset. However, spacecraft orbiting the moon, e.g., the Kaguya, do. Here is the earth rising and setting, as recorded in HD. (Via Aziz.)

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Speed Racer is probably worth skipping (though I might listen to Racer X). If you’re looking for an exciting race story, I recommend instead the Kuricorder Quartet’s take on “Highway Star”:

Here’s the quartet again with some tunes you might recognize.

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Understatement of the week:

Something tells me the commenter hasn’t met all that many nuns.

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Give peas a chance:

(Via Blackadder.)